Time to head out

   This is the time I dread the most as a father. Leaving for work...
   It's bad enough that my days off go by so quickly, but it's worse when I have to separate myself from my family. I work so hard to support them but at the same time I sacrifice most of my time away from the people I love the most. 
   My 3 year old has a doctor's appointment this morning but I couldn't go with him because I have to go to work. Right now I can't get the image of him out of my head. Holding on to his little red fire engine lunch box with a big smile on his face saying "Bye-bye daddy". It will be stuck with me all day.
   Is it so wrong to want to be at home with my kids all the time? Just how long am I going to be able to endure this torture? If I keep going like this I  am going to be at that point when my kids are grown and I've missed out on most of their childhood. 
   There are so many of us out there in similar situations. We work, work, work not because we want to. But because we have to. I easily spend more than 12 hours of my day away from home when you factor in travel. I spend a solid 90 minutes in my car each day plus a 10+ hour shift. 
   The human mind can only handle so much stress before it turns to a quivering pile of jelly. And then what use will I be if I suffer a mental breakdown?
   Luckily my children are too young to understand but what happens when they are older? 
   "Daddy are you coming to my soccer game?" 
   "Sorry baby, Daddy has to work."
   I can picture the scenario all to easily in my mind. Hopefully by that time I'll be out of this business and will have more time to help my children grow before they start to hate me...